LITTLE WHITE LIES, DEEP DARK SECRETS invents a new lexicon to explain how women, who confront double standards at every turn and the pressures of a culture obsessed with beauty, success and wealth, protect themselves and their families, please others, and safeguard their financial security. Barash identifies six styles of female lies as compassionate, beneficial, survival, designated, acceptable and betterment lies, and offers fascinating commentary on these and other issues:

  • The difference between how and why men and women lie.
  • How having a secret and lying is a coping mechanism for women.
  • When it’s a good idea to lie and when to give up a lie.
  • How the internet and our wired world offer women more ways to lie.
  • How lying can be an expression of rebellion against oppression

“The persistent discrepancies between women’s and men’s hopes and desires and the opportunities granted to each and the burdens shouldered by each, makes lying a necessary way of life for many American women,” notes Barash. “Raised to be ‘good girls,’ women lead complicated lives and lying is convenient tool at hand – our mothers have taught us how to lie, to fend off judgmental, prying eyes and combat those who seek to control us and keep us down.”

Ultimately the most damaging lies women tell are probably those they tell themselves, observes Barash. More than a few women have discovered how liberating it can be to dispel the pretenses of a marriage built on lies, a dissatisfying job, or an unproductive friendship.

Barash also notes the inherent risks in secrets and lies.” Sometimes the truth speaks louder than any elaborate survival lie we tell ourselves,” concludes Barash.